I would love to tell you that I’m always willing to be of service.
That I am so deeply connected that I never have doubts.
That I am healed of all my woundedness and, therefore, continuously on track with my mission.
If I said that, I would be lying.
You see, I’m still a human being.
Last weekend I facilitated a retreat for my Art of Feminine Marketing Mastermind clients.
I had planned for months.
I was excited about the transformation we were designing.
I was thrilled to get into a room with my clients to work with them to nail down their marketing language.
I was ecstatic about bringing in the amazing Lindsay Miller to photograph our journey.
Two days before the event, it hit.
The doubts that I was enough, the fear that they would ‘see through me’ and think I was a fraud, the anxiety about everything being just right.
I took a few deep breaths and moved forward.
I called my husband. “I don’t want to do the retreat,” I said.
“I know,” he answered. “You always say this. You’ll be fine once you get there and get into your groove.”
His lack of empathy was actually helpful. It reminded me of a pattern and I knew the answer was to look within.
“Hello, doubter,” I whispered to myself. “I see you. I recognize you. There is nothing to fear. Source is guiding me, protecting me, and will flow through me to be of best service.”
And so it was.
I showed up, opened myself and served. I even let Lindsay photograph me in an old, ratty bathrobe that represents my fear of being a fraud. Because a business coach should always show up in pearls and heals, right??? (Note: as I type, I’m in my “nice” bathrobe!)
Spirit infused the weekend with huge insights, healing tears, giddy laughter, and major breakthroughs on niche, marketing, and mission for all of our women.
I am grateful that I continue to show up, even when I don’t feel like it. This is my work, my purpose.